My Daughter and I Are One Entity

My nephew calls me Scarlett. He also calls my daughter Scarlett.  I’m fine with it, considering he used to call me “Racecar”, but it got me thinking like a two year old. In his eyes, Scarlett and I are one entity; I’m the attachment that comes with the baby.
Motherhood is great, but I feel susceptible to being signifier to just “Mom”. That being said, I think it’s very important to reestablish an identity outside of your children, but I also want to fully incorporate my identity into this role as well.
So, I’m working on setting up a Mom group for women in my area who have children under the age of one year.  They know what I’m going through and I know what they’re going through so we should get together and swap war stories. Haha.
Seriously though, we can share tips, go on outings, and just listen to each other. When I was pregnant and especially now, I just wanted someone to ask how I was doing, not rhetorically.
I ask my new mom friends how they are doing emotionally and I push past the socially proscribed answer: “I’m fine.”
We are all trained to think that not being okay is not okay.  Just because we are blessed with the ability to give birth and nurture a child doesn’t mean that it comes naturally or easily. I sure as hell got the baby blues after I gave birth, and I still get them now, but everyone is conditioned to not say anything about it because “everyone’s got problems”.
Well, I disagree. I shut myself off from people because I would reach out and try to help, advise, or simply just listen and when I needed that no one was ever around. That isn’t the answer. You shouldn’t stop helping others just because there was no reciprocity, you keep searching for those who will.
So moms, I say let’s form a bond and let’s be there for each other while we perform the greatest job in the world, the one that pays in love. 

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Stay tuned for your next slice of genius.

Day One of Three-Day Cleanse

So, in my last post, I discussed my toxic relationship with meat and how I’m not going to eat it as much, which is difficult since my mother is here from Dominican Republic cooking up a storm. But I’ve given up meat before. I did it for God, I can do it for myself.
So, today is the start of my three- day cleanse, I need to reboot, I’m not feeling my best.  Here’s what I’m doing: the Shakeology Three-Day Cleanse.

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Wish me luck, and stay tuned for your next slice of genius.

Diary of a Part-Time Carnivore

It’s the story of everyone’s life at some point in their lives: what you love doesn’t love you back. This is another unrequited love story. I LOVE MEAT, BUT MEAT DON’T LOVE ME!

As you all know, or should know if you’ve read my previous posts, I gave up meat for Lent. Being pescatarian felt great. I didn’t have any lags in energy and I wasn’t left hungry. Well, Lent ended and I resumed eating meat. I played Peaches and Herb’s “Reunited” as I took my first bite into a delicious hot dog.

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My first taste of meat after Lent ended.

Then, I went home and made some baked ribs with tostones and salsa verde.

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It felt great, like making up with your boyfriend after a nasty fight. You can’t get enough and you’re sure that this time the relationship will never end again. Then, you remember how toxic the relationship is for you; it doesn’t exactly bring out your best self, and, despite how good you feel when you’re together, you feel like crap later. You wonder if those few instances of happiness are worth the even more common, more prolonged, instances of pain.

In the end, you decide that the best thing is for you to let go of the relationship completely or maybe just be friends because you deserve a love that loves you back or at least loves you better.

This story is all too familiar, right? For me, it hits close to home because I went through this with an ex, who was definitely not the one for me, but he has been my best friend for years after we broke up. Now, I’m in the same situation with meat.

After not eating it for months, I feel how harmful it is for my body. I’ve suffered from acid reflux and digestive problems for years. While I was strictly pescatarian, I didn’t feel the heaviness in my stomach and my reflux was under control. I even ate tomatoes and oranges without consequences. Then, I started eating meat regularly again, and it’s like all of the negatives of my relationship with meat hit me hard. I had to start taking Prilosec again and all is not well in the digestive sector of my life. I’m forced with the decision again, do I want to remain in a toxic relationship, or do I want to end it?

I love meat, but meat don’t love me; so maybe we should just be friendly, see each other occasionally  and catch up, but not too often. I have decided to remain pescatarian, eating meat only once in a while.

Stay tuned for your next slice of genius.